Change of Course

We learned this week that N gave birth to a little boy and has made the decision to parent.  It seems likely that she has been planning this for awhile, perhaps the whole pregnancy.  So as it stands now, we will not have the privilege of welcoming this little one into our family.  But we trust God's sovereign plan and so even amidst the tears we firmly and fully believe that God is directing our paths, and the path of this little guy.  He is opening and closing doors, always working for our good and His glory.  What more could we ask for?

It was incredibly difficult to get this news. I've honestly never cried so hard in my entire life. Knowing the circumstances that we do, it is a heart-breaking change of plans. And yet we firmly believe that none of this is a surprise to God.  This has not spun out of His control.  And we are not the only source of good things and truth for this new little one.  God has other ways of drawing him to Himself and taking care of him.  We know God wanted us to say Yes to this adoption, and we trusted that He would say No if He had a different plan for us or for the baby or for N. God has said No to this adoption, and we are experiencing the peace that comes from walking in obedience to His instructions, even if it doesn't make sense to us.

Roses from our front yard

God has been working in advance to prepare us for this trial. (Isn't He good like that?)  I recently came across a quote by Alan Redpath that I've read over and over:

"There is nothing, no circumstance, no trouble, no testing that can ever touch me until, first of all, it has come past God and past Christ, right through to me. If it has come that far, it has come with a great purpose."

We feel so very loved by God to see how He is taking us through circumstances to draw us closer to Him.  We are seeing and knowing Him in ways we never would have if He just left us on our own merry way. 

The other day at the library I was working on my laptop and turned around to see all four of my children buried in books.  You can only imagine what this does for this book-loving Mama!

We believe God brought us into this situation because He wanted us to spend the last three months praying intensely for this mother and child, and we have the privilege of continuing to cover them in prayer. We covet your prayers for them as well.  We pray that both of them would come to know and love Jesus and spend their lives making much of Him.  May the chains of bondage be broken and the captives set free.  We will not give way to fear.

God has not fallen out of the business of making beauty out of ashes.  He's just going to do it in a different way than we were expecting.

²⁰ We wait in hope for the Lord;
    he is our help and our shield.
²¹ In him our hearts rejoice,
    for we trust in his holy name.
²² May your unfailing love be with us, Lord,
    even as we put our hope in you.

(the verses from Psalm 33 that are my kitchen windowsill reminder of where our hope is found!)

The Phone Call We Weren't Expecting

(Note: This is a long, drawn-out story.  If you just want the main point, read the first paragraph, and then jump to the end of the post.  I know some of you would like the details, so I’ve included them here.)


Wednesday, March 27 was a very normal kind of day.  We weren’t  expecting anything out of the ordinary to happen.  But as I was sitting down to eat a late lunch of leftover chili with cornbread, the phone rang.  I almost didn’t answer it because I wanted to stay focused on interacting with Calvin, Abigail, and Easton.  But I did answer.  It was one of the directors of the adoption agency that we had used with Emmery’s adoption.  She asked if we were open to another adoption.  She explained that Emmery’s birth mom (N) was pregnant and knew (due to some personal circumstances) that it was best to make an adoption plan for this baby.  N had asked if we would be willing to adopt the baby so that the siblings could be together.  So Wednesday, March 27 turned out not to be a normal kind of day after all.  It’s not every day you get a phone call asking if you will welcome another child into your family!!!

Being the patient, laid back person that I am, I waited for my husband to arrive home from work to share the news with him.  Oh, that’s right, I’m not patient and laid-back. :)  I immediately called him on his cell phone and made sure he was sitting down before I told him about the call.  I don’t remember the whole conversation, but the biggest thing that stood out was my husband’s response: “Well, I’ve actually been more open to another adoption than I’ve shared with you yet.”  God had been impressing on his heart the need to invest our limited number of days here on earth wisely and to use what He has blessed our family with to bless others.  We can’t change the entire world, but we can open our home and pour out Jesus’ love on one child.  And for that one child, the entire world is changed.

God had also been working on my heart and cultivating in me a renewed commitment to do anything He asked of me.   My first response to the news was one of sadness.  We had prayed so hard for N, and this did not seem to be an answer to our prayers for her.  It took a while for me to realize that the fact that she chose life, and that she cared enough to request that the siblings be placed in the same family WERE answers to prayer.  We hadn’t known to be praying for her in these ways, but God had definitely been working. And we believe He is still working...

Every adoption story includes heart break and loss.  That is true even of the ultimate adoption…God bringing us into His family.  He understands the brokenness of this situation we are in the middle of. He is not oblivious to the hurt and the loss.  And yet in the midst of this messed up world, where things are not as they should be, He is at work redeeming.  He shines at making beauty out of ashes. 

God had clearly been preparing our hearts for this surprise phone call.  We had been wondering if it would be good for Emmery to have a sibling of the same race and close in age to her.  God had also been softening our hearts toward another adoption.  We are not impulsive decision makers, though.  When we have a decision to make, we tend to pray, think about it, research, talk about it, pray about it, dismiss it for a while, pray a bit more…  This was a HUGE decision to make and I think God knew the “praying about it stage” could just go on forever so He decided to make things much more obvious to us and had the agency call us!

Now that we had a very clear opportunity in front of us, it was obvious God had been getting us ready!  We took several days to pray about it and listen to God’s leading.  Once we were pretty sure this was what God had for us, we told our children and asked them to pray about it and share any of their concerns and feedback with us.  Abigail immediately shouted out, “Say Yes! Say Yes!!!!” And Easton said, “Well, I didn’t think our family was full yet. “ (He’s always up for some adventure. :)

So if you decided to go for the short version of the story, here it is: We ended up honoring Abigail’s request and we said Yes!  Unless God changes our course, we will be welcoming a little boy into our family around June 25th.  In our hearts, he already feels like part of our family, and we can’t wait to meet him.  From the very moment of conception, God has had His hand on this little boy and He has a perfect plan for each of his days.  We are thrilled that in God’s sovereignty He decided to put this precious child in our family.  He will be loved to pieces by us, and even better, we can’t wait to point Him to the God who loves him perfectly and will never let him down.

We covet your prayers for us as we walk this journey.  We want to live to the fullest the little tiny role God has given us in His Big Story.  Please pray for protection for this little boy and that God would minister to N in all the ways she needs.

Official

Yesterday was a big day of celebration in our house because Emmery is now officially part of the family!!! Of course, she's felt like part of the family since the day she was born, but it's a big milestone to have all the legal paperwork taken care of. There is normally a six month waiting period before an adoption can be finalized, but the Judge in MS waived the waiting period, so we were able to finalize early. Our attorney represented us in court, so we did not have to go anywhere yesterday. 

When we received the news that everything had gone smoothly and the adoption was now official, tears of joy flooded my eyes. What a joy to know that in this fallen world, where things are not as they should be, God has a sovereign plan for little Emmery. We are grateful beyond words that we get to be part of this plan and pray that she grows up to find deep comfort in God's perfect plan for each of her days.

"A father to the fatherless and a defender of widows is God in his holy habitation.  

God takes the lonely and sets them in families." -Psalm 68:5-6

I couldn't ask for a better father for this precious baby!!!

Calvin enjoying a few moments with his baby before he starts his day

Filling in the Details

I wanted to document some of the ways we saw God's hand at work in all the details surrounding our daughter's arrival. If you've been following our adoption journey and were hoping for a few more specifics on our time in MS, this post is for you. :) 

We knew that our birthmom was scheduled to be induced on 11/1/11, so we packed everything possible the night before and headed to bed early, but of course I couldn't sleep well. We got a call in the early morning from the social worker (Leah) who had taken our birthmom to the hospital saying everything was a go, so we loaded up and headed off while it was still dark. We drove two vehicles so that Dan would be able to drive back as soon as we went to court. Abigail rode with Dan, and the boys were with me. We showed Calvin and Abigail how to text on our cell phones, so they had fun communicating that way.

The really exciting texts were the ones that Leah sent me through the morning, giving us updates on the progression of the labor...
11:14 a.m. "water broken...nurse guessing early evening delivery"
12:19 p.m. "baby coming...let u know as soon as can"
And at 1:09 p.m. Leah called me and said, "She's here!!!"  The baby was born at 12:29 p.m. (so much for an evening delivery!) We were still four hours from the hospital, but we had plenty of adrenalin to move us there quickly!

We arrived at the little hospital just after 5 p.m. and got the kids set up in the waiting room, then Leah took us back to meet Emmery's birthmom (N.)  The baby was still in the nursery, so it was just the four of us and it felt surprisingly natural.  We asked N. how she was feeling and talked some about the labor.  We'd only been in the room a few minutes when the nurses brought Emmery in.  They placed her in N's arms, but she only held her briefly before she handed her to Dan.

First time in Daddy's arms

The nurses informed us that they had a private room for us, and N. wanted a chance to rest, so we moved to our own room and the kids had the opportunity to meet their new sister.  It felt surreal and yet so very natural all at the same time.  All of the hospital staff was incredibly supportive during our entire hospital stay (and we've heard stories of hospitals being very anti-adoption, so this was a huge blessing!)  Some of the nurses were adoptive moms, and all of them were very grateful that we were there to welcome Emmery into our family. 

The nurses dressed Em in this gown with matching blanket before bringing her out of the nursery to us

I was able to have a couple meaningful conversations with N. and get to know more of her situation.  Oh how I wished I could help her in so, so many ways!  I tried to weave the Gospel into our discussion and she seemed interested, but not fully understanding.  We pray often for her to fully understand and embrace Jesus as her Redeemer.  We know He is her only hope!  I can not wrap my mind around what it must have felt like to carry this baby in her womb for nine months, and then to place her in our arms.   She was anxious to get home, so she was discharged at 24 hrs.  She came to our room to say good-bye and I placed Emmery in her arms so she could hold her before she left.  A social worker (Renae) who has been very involved with N. for several months was there to take her home.  She did not display much emotion, but I'm sure she was tearing up inside.   When they walked away and I looked at our precious baby, I was overcome with many emotions...sorrow for the loss N. was experiencing, gratitude for the privilege of being able to welcome this child into the love of our family, amazement that God had intervened in this baby's destiny, more sorrow over the knowledge of the life N. lives - and the awareness that she represents so many other precious young women who have never known a man who honestly loved them, never mind the God who loves them perfectly... Heart-breaking.

Our attorney and agency agreed to do everything possible to get us into court Friday afternoon so that Dan could get back to work.  MS state law requires birthmoms to wait 72 hrs after they give birth before they can sign papers to terminate their parental rights.   Friday morning I was caring for the baby in the hospital and Renae called, saying that N. requested to see the baby again.  I said that was fine (but of course I wondered if that was really best a couple hours before she signed the papers.)  N. ended up changing her mind, saying it would be too emotional for her to see the baby then.  Those last few hours leading up to the time when N. would  sign were a bit uneasy for us.  I told Dan, “I do believe God’s sovereignty, but I’d be lying to say I don’t have a tight feeling in my stomach now.”

Abigail's first opportunity to change a diaper!

We were driving to the attorney’s office when we received a text saying that N. had signed all the papers.  By that point we knew enough of the situation to know that this was absolutely what needed to happen for the best interest of this baby, and we were also already quite attached to this little bundle, so that was a moment of praising God as we drove along in our van!  The social workers shared with us that N. did not hesitate at all to sign and that she believed she was doing what was best.  We have been so pleased with the way our agency has invested in and loved N. before, during, and after the birth.  It was very important to us to find an agency that treated the birth moms with dignity and respect, and this has definitely been the case!

After meeting with the attorney (more paperwork), we drove to the court.  Since it was already mid-afternoon on a Friday, the doors to the court were locked, but we went through a side door and wound our way through a dark building all the way back to the judge’s office.  She was there waiting for us, as she had agreed to.  The judge, the attorney, two social workers, and all five of us (Emmery had to stay in the hospital still because of her jaundice) squeezed into the judge’s office and held court right there.  The judge listened intently as Dan answered the attorney’s questions about why we had decided to adopt.  She even made a couple notes on what he stated because she said it inspired her in her parenting of her teens!  After all parties presented their parts of the “case,” the judge granted us temporary legal custody of Emmery LaShea.  The adoption is scheduled to be finalized in February. 

At home - I could snuggle with her all day!

Calvin, Abigail, and Easton were all on their best behavior - confidently shaking hands and introducing themselves to the attorney, and then later to the judge as well.  The judge was so impressed with their behavior that she stopped halfway through our hearing and complimented them on how well they were doing.  God definitely answered my Dad’s prayers for stamina for all three of our big kids during the entire experience including long days in the hospital, less-than-restful nights in the hotel, and being dragged around to boring meetings.  They rose to the occasion and we were very grateful for them to be part of the process of welcoming their new sister into our family.

This is one well-loved and kissed-on baby girl!!!

When we went to bed that Friday night, I told Dan “this has been one of the best days of my life!”  Words fall far short in my attempt to communicate the intensity of a day like this.  God had answered prayer all around us and had chosen to entrust this precious life into our care.  There was absolutely nothing we could have done to orchestrate all of this - it was completely God’s doing.  He is in the miracle-making business and we are thrilled to be along for the ride!  We are truly grateful for the many, many people who were covering us with prayer - God answered over and over!

Last feeding with Daddy before he and Easton headed home

A few days later  I did have the opportunity to meet up with Emmery’s birth mom so that she could see her one last time.  I’m thankful that some day we’ll be able to honestly tell our daughter that her first mom loved her and selflessly did what was best for her baby in spite of how difficult it was.  We will have contact with N. through our agency…  we will send photos and updates of the baby to the agency, and they forward them along to her.  I am thankful that we live in the day where there can be some openness in adoption and it doesn’t have to be completely closed. 

Calvin loving on his baby - he is so good with her!!

We loved experiencing true southern hospitality during our time in MS.  I think if we’d been there one day longer I would’ve come back saying “y’all” on a regular basis.   Little Emmery got to be in six different states before she even turned two weeks old!  She was a good traveler and we were thrilled to arrive back in OH and begin life as a family of six.  I’ll try to share more details soon on how that’s going!

3 weeks old

Bye-bye, Hospital!

Saturday morning Emmie's labwork indicated that her levels were decent enough that she could come out of the light bed.  We were so excited to spend the day holding her close!  After her blood draw last night (this poor baby has had so many vials of blood collected from her little feet!!), they were able to discharge her!  We brought her "home" to the hotel and began the adjustment to newborn nights. :)

Dan and Easton made it safely back to OH yesterday.  Our paperwork will be arriving at the MS office tomorrow so we're praying they process it quickly and that our stay in this state will be brief.  We've been enjoying the amazing southern hospitality.   They take friendliness to a new level here!  Dan took the kids on one Civil War field trip while he was here, and I hope to take them on another one tomorrow.  We want to make the most of our stay!

Once we're back home we'll be able to share more photos of our precious bundle. Thank you all for your kind words and prayers. 

Introducing...

She's here!!!  As planned, our birthmom was induced on Tuesday morning.  We drove all day and arrived to meet our baby when she was only 5 hours old!  The hospital has been extremely adoption-friendly.  They provided us with our own room immediately, so the baby was able to room-in with us.  We were able to have meaningful conversations with our birthmom - a huge answer to prayer.

In God’s divine sovereignty He led our birthmother to sign the surrender forms Fri. afternoon. And in a major answer to prayer (thank you, everyone!), our agency, attorney, and judge all bent over backwards to accommodate us by allowing us to go to court Fri. afternoon where we were granted temporary legal custody of our sweet baby (it will be a few months until the official finalization.)



NAME: Emmery LaShea (nickname: Emmie)



BORN: 11.1.11


AT: 12:29 p.m. CDT


WEIGHT: 7#, 4.5 oz


LENGTH: 19.5"




Holding my new daughter (bangs hiding the tears of joy!)



Our travel weary children meeting their new sister

The four siblings hanging out in the hospital - something we've been doing a lot of!

Abigail wasted no time in putting a bow in her sister's hair!

Daddy and his girls

We brought cupcakes to celebrate Emmie's very first birthday.  Our birthmom loved this as she was really craving some chocolate!

Day 2 - we got the news that Emmery had to begin photo therapy and stay under the lights at all times.  They told us we could still touch her all we wanted so that's what we've done!

Last night we took her out of her light bed so Dan could enjoy some time with her before he heads home today.



Oh yeah - she really is that cute!!  (Don't mind the milk dripping out of her mouth. :)



All three men working as a team (Easton was concerned she needed a diaper change)

This is typically how much space Abigail likes to have between herself and Emmie



Alright - enough of these photos!  Time to go back to sleep in her light bed.



 
 
 Emmery is still in the hospital b/c she has jaundice (caused by an incompatibility between her blood type and her mother's blood type) so she is using light therapy and labwork is being done every 12 hours to monitor the treatment. Her levels had come down well last night so we're really hoping she can come out of her bili-bassinet today!  Please pray for continued healing for Emmie so that she can be discharged soon, and for MS and OH to process our interstate clearance paperwork quickly so we can all return home soon. Dan and Easton are heading back today, and the rest of us will be waiting for clearance.
 
We are overwhelmed by God's blessing in our lives and are thrilled beyond words to have this precious bundle join our family!!

Coming Soon!

Unless Baby comes on her own, our birthmother is scheduled to be induced on November 1st.  We are excited to meet our new daughter soon!

All three kids are continuing to adjust very well.  Abigail got to go to a birthday tea party last night, all dressed up as a princess.  All the little girls were from church, so it gave her a chance to get to know some friends she'll be seeing on a regular basis!  Calvin has been working hard on learning to tie all sorts of different knots as part of the Boys Club he attends on Wednesday nights at church.  Easton is still finding lots of time to ride his bike and makes sure things don't get too quiet around here. :)

We'll be back in a few days with more baby news!

Ready!!!

(Our computer was returned without being repaired, so after some extended phone calls and futile attempts at trouble-shooting, it's been sent back to the service department again.  That means no photos again - sorry!)

As of Friday, all of our paperwork has been completed and we are ready for our baby's arrival!  It is a relief to be done with the paper chase and the barrage of questions we had to answer.  And we are especially thankful that we won't have to worry about any creative alternatives that would have been necessary if the baby had arrived before our paperwork was done.  So thank you for your prayers!

At this point, we're just waiting the phone call that our birthmom is in labor and then we will hit the road.   We are looking forward to spending some time with our birthmom in the hospital and are praying that God gives us words that will speak life and encouragement into her heart. She is making a courageous, well-thought-out, wise, and yet heart-wrenching decision and we covet your prayers on her behalf.

We are continuing to enjoy settling into our new life and the kids have been incredibly positive.  As we've learned more about the people in the church and what God's up to, we're increasingly grateful that He has led us here.  We are excited to learn more about the plans He has for us in this new season.

Abigail's Wish is Granted

Oh, if you could have seen Abigail's expression when she found out that an ultrasound indicated it's a girl baby who will be joining our family! She was hoping desperately for a sister (though of course she loves her brothers dearly), and her wish has been granted!

Abigail made this sign to share the news with you!

The sonogram also indicates that the baby is more likely due around 11/7 (though we know she'll come when she's ready regardless of what any calendar says!) So we have adjusted our move plan to get us to OH as quickly as possible in order to (hopefully!) have time to update all of our paperwork and settle in a bit before she arrives. The moving truck will be here next week for us to load up, then we'll depart our beloved NH on 9/26. Some empty boxes are calling my name now...

New(s)

In case you were still wondering after the not-so-subtle clues I posted the other day, there are a lot of new things about to happen around here…

New job, new house, new church, and, as God’s timing would have it, a new baby too!!!  God has clearly opened doors and led Dan to accept a position as Business Manager at a growing church in OH.  The job responsibilities seem to be a perfect fit for him, and we’re excited about what God is doing in and through the church.  God has provided a home for us to rent while we get to know the area and search for long-term housing.  We were planning on a 10/1 move date, but just recently we agreed to a match with a birth mom who is due on (of all 365 days in the year) 10/1!  Doesn’t God have a sense of humor?  So, the plan is to wait til Baby arrives, and then move.  That’s our news in a nutshell!  We appreciate your prayers as we desire to please God moment by moment, no matter what each day holds.

Praying for Our Birthmother

Credit

Many of you have been kind enough to let us know that you are praying for the mother of the baby we will be adopting.  We don't yet know the mom or the child, but we are seeking to pray very specifically for both of them.  Here are some of the ways we are praying so you can join us in loving our birthmother through prayer:

• We pray that she will receive loving support as she makes an adoption plan - that she will not feel helpless and alone.
• She may need prayer for the courage to choose life, and for divine obstacles to stand in the way of any attempt to end the baby's life.
• We pray that her heart would be open to the Gospel and that she’d be overwhelmed by God’s love for her.
• We pray for her physical health, and that she would be wise with what she puts into her body.
• We pray that she would be able to trust our family to love and care for this child who is growing within her.
• We pray for our agency to have wisdom in loving her, meeting her needs, and pointing her towards the Savior.

  

“All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.”  Psalm 139:16

Adoption: Why Infant?

We are in the process of a domestic, transracial adoption of an infant.  I already shared some of our thoughts on Why Domestic? HERE and Why Transracial? HERE.  This post is to explain Why Infant?

We felt it was best to keep our current birth order for this season of life, so we knew that the child would need to be younger than Easton.  We desired to have the maximum amount of time for training and discipling this child in his or her foundational years, so we set "under two" as our target age.

Most of the time when a child is voluntarily placed for adoption in the United States, it takes place at birth (or shortly thereafter.)  If a child is removed from the home and placed in foster care, they are unlikely to become "adoptable" anytime soon because the goal (understandably!) is to reunite them with their biological families.  We are hoping that by adopting a child at birth, it may spare this child the potential pain of entering foster care because his parents were not in a healthy situation to raise him.

So we are trying to mentally prepare for the newborn phase!  We know it will all come back to us when it's time, and all the sleepless nights, spit-up, diaper changes, etc. will be 100% worth the joy of welcoming this little one into our family!

Adoption: Why Transracial?

We have been adopted transracially into God's family, and we think that bringing a child into our family who is a different race than we are is perfect preparation for heaven, where our eternal family will consist of every race created!

 

“You are worthy to take the scroll and to open its seals, because you were slain,

and with your blood you purchased men for God 

from every tribe and language and people and nation.”

Revelation 5:9

Listen to this quote from D. A. Carson: "The ultimate community of God is transnational, transtribal, transracial, translinguistic. In that sense, Los Angeles is a better anticipation of heaven than Tulsa, Oklahoma. Let the church, strengthened by the grace of God, live out now, as largely as possible, what she will one day be."  (Carson, D. A. (1998). For the love of God : A daily companion for discovering the riches of God's Word.)

Sadly, it is much more difficult to find adoptive families who are willing to welcome a child of a minority race into their family.  Birth moms who are pregnant with a Caucasian child have many, many options when they are deciding what family to place their child with.  But a woman who is pregnant with a Black baby has far fewer options.  Sometimes she may come to an agency and find that they have NO families waiting to adopt her child.  This seems so wrong!!!  Granted, there are additional challenges to becoming a multi-cultural family but there are resources to help with that and ways to become educated on the unique needs.  And at the end of the day, these precious children need a family to love them and welcome them and teach them about the God who made them and has a perfect plan for them!

God has moved our family to adopt as a way to obey His command to care for the fatherless, not as a way of getting a baby that looks as much as possible like our other children. We want to go where there is a need.  So we are pursuing a transracial adoption!

Some more thoughts, if this topic is of interest to you:

http://joiningthejourney.blogspot.com/2010/10/domestic-adoptionorphan-or-not.html

http://ordinaryheroblog.blogspot.com/2010/02/adoptive-families-needed-for-african.html

Adoption: Why Domestic?

I thought I'd share a bit about how we decided to pursue domestic (and not international) adoption...

Are there needs everywhere?  Yes!  There are children all over the world in need of loving families.  There are approximately 5 million orphans in Ethiopia alone.  Little Guatemala has approximately 350,000 orphans.

We were very open to pursuing international adoption and did quite a bit of research on it.  A question that kept coming to our minds, however, was "If we got on a plane to fly to ___________, would we be flying right over someone much closer to home who is in need?"  We actually looked into the needs within our state foster care system, but God clearly shut the door there.

Guatamela?  Not allowing adoptions now.  China is tightening its restrictions on adoptions.  Ethiopia is considering cutting the number of adoptions it allows by 90%.  Very, very sad.  I'm not saying international adoption is not needed or that it's impossible.  It is possible (when the countries allow it) and it is needed.

There are actually many children right here in our own country who need forever families and we felt God clearly leading us to domestic adoption.  Our hearts are broken for orphans all over the world.  We long for Christ's return when all will be made right and there will be no more abandoned, abused, neglected, unwanted precious children!

More coming soon on "why infant?" and "why transracial?"

Officially Waiting

Adoption Update

Our home study was successfully completed, and the agency we're using in MS has reviewed and accepted our application, so that means we are on the official waiting list now!

"What next?" you may be asking (at least that's what Calvin asked when we told him.)  Well, when an expectant mother contacts the agency and desires to make an adoption plan for her baby, she is given a number of profiles to review so that she can select the family she would like to place her child with.  If she selects our family, then we are notified and if we agree, we are matched. 

"And when?" you might wonder (at least I have!!)  Well, exactly when God plans for it to happen.  The agency has stated that most placements (with the criteria we have set) take place in under a year.  They would have no way of knowing when needs will arise, and when our family would be a good fit to meet one of those needs.  When we are notified of a need, we will share the news, but in the meantime there really will be no updates to give.  We have completed the part we had human responsibility for, and now the timetable is entirely in God's hands.  We have incredible peace about having our sovereign God in charge of the entire thing - who would want it any other way?!


"What if...."  I'm thinking you might wonder what happens if the mother changes her mind at any point after she's selected our family?  Well, this does indeed happen (it is God's design for a mother to have a strong desire to care for the child growing within her, regardless of extenuating circumstances.)  Our agency works extensively with the mothers to provide counsel and support.  If she changes her mind, we know God had a different plan for her and for us and we will leave it in His hands.  God is sovereign.

"What now?"   Now we continue to focus on covering the baby, its mother, and its father in prayer.  We pray for guidance, for health, for wisdom in making tough choices, for the support they need, etc.  And our biggest prayer is for them to have their hearts opened to the gift of the Gospel, if they do not yet have a personal saving faith.  We have no paperwork left to do, but we continue to read and research so that we are prepared (as much as possible) to become a multi-cultural family.  We believe that at some point (on a very undetermined date!) God will be bringing another child into our family, and we are excited about that!  But we know that each day brings specific needs that God has ordained for us to meet, so we are seeking to live in daily surrender and submission to Him - listening to His voice in both the big things and the little things.

Thank you for your prayers and support.  We will keep you posted!

Our Big News!

God has led us to begin a very exciting journey: we're going to adopt a baby!  (This is how my Mom wishes I made the announcement to her, with the end of the story first! :)

Now, for a little background...  Adoption is something that we have been open to for many years.   Over the past 1.5 years we've spent a lot of time reading, praying, researching, praying, discussing, praying, trying to put it out of minds and POP! having God put it right back there again.  God has been showing us that He created us to be used up during our time here on earth.  We have all of eternity to spend being comfortable.  Right now, He wants us to be poured out, serving in the unique ways He's gifted us to.  We read Crazy Love (you don't want to miss this treasure!)  We read Radical (a powerful, must-read!).  We sensed an on-going conviction that it was time to act.  There are endless needs around the world, but we felt God specifically leading us to open our hearts and home to a child who needs a forever family.  We desire to be part of changing the destiny of a child's life by raising them in a gospel-centered home.  Adoption is very close to the heart of God, and we think this is a great way to do our part in caring for the fatherless.  Not every one is called to adopt, but we're all called to do our part.

Easton happily doing his part for the adoption!

So, the journey has begun.  That means I spent the better part of January researching agencies and filling out paperwork.  The phone would ring and Easton would say, "Mom!  It might be an adoption agency!!"  All three kids have embraced our vision for the way God is calling our family to serve and they have big plans for this baby!

We've completed physicals, child abuse clearances, fingerprinting and criminal clearances, home study interviews inquiring into the greatest DETAIL of every part of our history and present, sending out reference forms, writing our autobiographies, submitting our financials, assembling a family profile, and fulfilling training requirements.

Seems like only ONE thing was required to become biological parents.  Right.


Any time I am mindful of the ways this process might be an inconvenience to our family, I am immediately reminded of the ultimate "inconvenience" Christ went to so that we could be adopted into God's family!

current reading - notice a theme?

We are pursuing domestic, infant, transracial adoption.  We have reasons for each, but that can be another post, another day.  Once all the paperwork is processed, we begin waiting an indefinite period of time (probably less than 12 months.)

We covet your prayers as we walk this path of trusting and obeying.  We are so excited about all that God has in store for us and are anxious to meet the little one He has planned to place in our family!